The Cast Seed
Actually I DO get that there is a dimension somewhere in me that “knows” – otherwise there could not be any sense of “not knowing.”
What a paradox! One’s inner life seems like a planetary system, all these globes whirling around in constantly shifting alignments and positions and influences.
Or like globules of oil in water, bumping into one another and blurping into larger globules from time to time, losing their smaller identity to become something more complete.
The part of me that knows is staring at the part that thinks it doesn’t know.
And THAT part is staring – or glaring – back going, “Come on, sucker, let’s get on with this enlightenment thing!”
Good grief, when will this endless drama be over?
Or maybe it is over already and I just haven’t noticed.
Jesus says the kingdom of God is:
“As if a man should cast seed into the ground; and should sleep, and rise night and day, and the seed should spring up and grow, he knoweth not how” (Mark 4:27).
So much energy goes into the effort of spiritual striving for self-perfection. The prayers, meditations, readings. The talking and mulling and suffering and struggling.
Really! Do we even know whether any of this is accomplishing anything?
The seed has already been cast. It is springing up and growing, and WE DON'T KNOW HOW.
Sometimes this seems so clear and obvious, but then the not-knowing me starts squaring off against the knowing me again.
These two pugilists seem to be circling each other like Sumi wrestlers, looking for that moment of ultimate engagement, where the final take-down will occur and someone shouts
"I GIVE!"
It is so great! Big smiles... Today i get the 'cosmic joke', laughing still.
ReplyDeleteWas it Eienstien that said, "there is a fine line between genius and insanity?" I think i am getting to know that line better. or should i say feel that line?
Some of the stuff I feel I do KNOW from experiences I couldn't make happen if I tried with all my will, well, I also 'Know' I am not able to contain it in this moment. They say the past present and future are really all the same, so that line of insanity... does it seem less insane as we grow into what we know? I have listened to many share what they perceive coming toward us as we countdown to 2012. I wonder about the Prophets in scripture CD? Like when they were shown stuff that was to come, I wonder how it was for them... must have freaked them out from where they were at in that moment. Did they trust or just think they were just confused and insane?
ReplyDeleteIn wrestling terms, I so often feel like I am being chicken winged. I give, I give!
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ReplyDeleteIn session 10 MB instructs, (NO WATER SESSIONS ARE TO BE DONE FROM NOW TO OUR POINT OF COMPLETION).
ReplyDeleteIt was a terrable week. no one wanted to be near me after day 4. Presence couldn't radiate, something else was.
How could one 'appreciate' oneself in that condition?
I even went camping on the Swannee river memorial day weekend. Camping made matters worse. My tent leaked during the torrential rains. Yes, I got wet, blanket, pillow, matress, everthing wet. hope that doesn't count as a water session. that week without warter sessions put me in a dark place. Its just now starting to lift. I can tell cause this morn while layin in bed breathing, i thought,"What if the Greatest Treasure rests beneath a pile of mis spelled, mis punctuated words?"
This is the nature of duality.
ReplyDeleteWe live in a world of polar opposites, or polarities.
Knowing/Not knowing, Doing/Being, Enlightenment/Ignorance, Perfection/Imperfection are just a few of the ones you've mentioned, that I think any spiritual seeker can relate to.
And that, of course, is another one: seeking/finding.
In TPP Session 6, MB talks about how: "While we live in time and are still attempting to have 'a good time' or at least an 'easy time', we are in an experience of polarities. We are attempting to have a good time because we feel so bad, and we are attempting to make things easy for ourselves because our life experience feels so hard".
The whole purpose of TPP is balance and integration of these polarities. Not favouring one over another, and trying to escape from one to another, but recognising that they are all just energy in motion.
This is especially difficult for anyone with a religious background, as Christianity, for example, strongly favours good over bad, right over wrong etc. etc. A lot of them preach love, but it sure feels like hate ...
Oh, is that there some more stuff for me to integrate around Christianity???
Thank you Ruth for sharing that, it's an awesome analogy, makes 'knowing' more understandable. lol I do 'know' for sure I soooooo appreciate all who share here, I feel a deep deep welling up of gratefulness.
ReplyDelete'pewdoc' ;)
To the Anonymous who asked about the prophets or 'seers' of the past, if they felt insane or confused having to contain such information, I bet they did feel crazy sometimes and more often alone. I wonder if some came to realize that we are creating this Earth life experience, so the 'Mood' (hopefully not 'doom')we brodcast from our inner being is incredably powerful?
ReplyDeleteI have heard that the quantitative numbers of people do not matter as much as the quality of the vibrational frequency of a certian few.
I am so glad you asked that question. I have returned to a locked door and your question was the key inserted. Is it time now? Once having become aware of our emersion in Presence or that state of beingness MB refers to as "the Bridge", am I ready to turn the lock and open the door?
Maybe that is exactly what the Presence Portal/ Process is; the Door and once opened we feel Presence everywhere and within more and more out of and in time.
I realized in " LIVING WEBSTER Encyclopedic DICTIONARY of the English Language" this morning that the line up of words is
donothing
Don Quixote
don't
dontopedalogy ( i really liked this one)
doodad
doodle
doom
dooms.day
door
Makes me want to take the Door!
With all the the doodads and doodles in my heart I so love you Suzette! I appreciate your input about what we 'broadcast' from our heart center, it really involves 'discipline' to clean out all the twisted vibes, you speak truth. After I left that comment a little birdie remembered me to Mary being visited by Gabriel and how it freaked her out, but then that she quietly pondered the blessings in her heart. I feel we will all experience more and more funky stuff as we countdown...'The seed has already been cast. It is springing up and growing, and WE DON'T KNOW HOW'
ReplyDeleteFunny,today I had a typo, I intended to type eraser and typed...eraseer!
You are an Era Seer!
xo,Don Quixote ;)
how very sweet thank you
ReplyDelete